For the first time I just listened to a blog post, a podcast, narrated by a dear friend. A warm voice, emotional music, giving me so much nostalgia about so many chances I missed, skills I could have developed, people I could have made friends, places I wanted to be attached to. How I thought of many things so lightly and how I realize now how important they really are.
I realize the importance of having someone you fully trust, with whom you have all the freedom you want to talk, just talk. I understand people's reactions when they know that I live alone for so long. I understand how is this translated to my endless passion and desire to adhere to something I love, a group of people, a project, something I feel that I can support because what I really need is how to gain back this support.
I realize how short is the span of my attachments, for all my life I was the traveler kind, not staying in the same place from 1 to 3 years, always traveling, always gaining and losing friends, rarely regaining them and sometimes losing them again. I never really experienced how someone can be so lonely until I fell in love then broke up, and for reasons that are not in my hands. Now I understand how strange or silly some people might act because of this…
But, like my friend says, pray that you can go back in time, but you can't…
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