Mohamed ElGohary

How many times did you wish that you are an invisible person, swimming in the sea of people with no possibility of being noticed, in the positive or negative side. Imagine how free you will be…
No one will ever criticize you, no one will laugh at you. The absolute freedom vs the absolute solitude. You sing loudly with no one caring, getting out all your emotions, all your suffer, all your pain, all your happiness, all your joy. Jumping, dancing, screaming…Everything is for free, no cost.

Is it really for no cost…

Everything has its bad sides you know. You will miss care, love, the shoulder to cry on…Lonliness…Fear…

Can you just balance the two before it is too late, to stabilize your character, to reform your internal stability, to control your head. The human will is so powerful when fully used. You can say goodbye to anything, you can commit to anything. You can live with anything, you can let go of anything…The fabulous human will which changes one's self 180 degrees then sometimes to another 180 degrees, going back in the same road.

Immortality of ideas…

While I'm listening to Creed:

Hello my friend. We meet again
It's been a while. Where should we begin?
Feels like forever
Within my heart are memories of perfect love that you gave to me
Oh, I remember
When you are with me, I'm free, I'm careless, I believe
Above all the others, we'll fly. This brings tears to my eyes
My sacrifice

We've seen our share of ups and downs
Oh, how quickly life can turn around in an instant
It feels so good to reunite within yourself and within your mind
Let's find peace there

I just want to say hello again

My sacrifice

hmph… Memories

Anyway…

People attach to other people, and sometime people attach to values, meanings…

Because meanings do not die, they are not teard upon becuase they are not buried or killed. Values are not perfortated…

But, the price must be paid, people can't love an idea, can not touch it, while in the mean time, loved people die, can get away, while you cry for their departure…

Equation? Equivalent terms? God bless mothers who lost their kids…

Egypt officials announced that Egypt will enter the era of Nuclear energy after decades of waiting for it. I don't know what are the reasons for this acceptance, or let me say debating from the Egyptian government, and what is more astonishing the international, let me say, happiness by this project. USA, and then comes France? What are the reasons? Nothing.

Is there something disasterous planned against us? Is there any hygienic hazard from this project? Will it be in Sinai? There are many things we don't know and probably we won't know about this government. And again we are not doing anything.

Must we wait until we die from radiation to move? What if a disaster happens? The problem here is that the disaster will not be narrow ranged, it might affect the whole country.

God save this country. Egypt prevails.

More flamenco music…feeling excited, cool, though I used to feel awful in the beginning of any academic year, like anyone would do. I don't feel it this year. Maybe because one my major depressing factors when away? Gone with with wind? Maybe, I just love it this way. Less depression, life is more appealing. Away from psyhcopathics, idiots…:D I think I will imitate the role of Voice of London (V for Vendetta) soon enough.

Currently listening to some flamenco guitar music I didn't listen to for a while. I don't know why music always make me think about the past, my momories.

Strange people entered my life, while till now I didn't figure out there attitude. Came and gone without any mark in my life. The only lesson I learnt is that many things happen, telling us not to ask, questioning our ability to overcome curioisity. Though now and then I still try to analyze, to figure out while things went this way. What makes me feel not disappointed, is that everytime I think about it, I realize a new thing, a new experience. The thing I always believe in, the value of realization.

Certain people, occupy some place in my heart, although I did suffer a lot from their cruelty or ignoring, I don't know why. They are not one or two, they are many. Many say I'm a cool character, others say the opposite, I have no problem with this. The problem is when they say so behind my back, and what makes me more furious, when they complain that others do the same thing, disgusting, is it not?

Every one of us in a way or another love music. Music exists in all kinds, producing all kinds of emotions. For me, sometimes a certain music explodes some stream of emotions inside me, filling me with all kinds of feelings. Happiness…sadness…hatred…love…How unstable my state becomes, my eyes become so full of tears.

These kinds are only music, no words, just melodies. They strike me as if I am a random canon food being blown up in the air…Changing directions randomly in the air…Changing my shape every moment…seeking internal stability.

How can music be so powerful like this? I even read that music composed by Mozart raises the IQ of the listener. Can music be so good to change the characters of us? Producing more respecting human beings, lessen violence in our society? Researchers must use these magical effects of music to improve humanity as a whole; it can be a science I guess. “Long live music”…

Sadly i was in that situation agian, forgive me saso.. i used to get confused each time i find myself in that situation, sometimes i feel a completly hatred towards someone hurted me badly and just decide not totalk to her/him just to find myself in that silly situation of forgive me .. i simply do that

It isn't an angelic attitude i'm too far from that, but can't stand loosing a friend for a stupid sorry which won't mend any hurt anyway, it's just that way to me who you are to me comes before how deep you hurted me. so i just forget about it when you were a close and dear one to me, while i don't drop it with people not that important for me

It's like a scale i just put those things make me drop that whole thing against things might make me not, so it isn't about the apology itself i may forget without apology at all if she/he was a close one to me

People i'm not to say be an angel, but just don't let people you love go, keep them even if you had to disclaim a little right which is that useless apology. life is to short to waste on these things, and i just want to live it in a mind peace.

Such a word, how many great things happened in our world
for the sake of appreciation? How was this word the motivation for many great works? All of us always expect a word of thanking, gratitude, in short, appreciation after any good act made by us. I guess it is one of the most beautiful things on Earth, the feeling of being appreciated, maybe even more powerful than love itself.

Speaking of the other side, the negative side of appreciation. Talking about ignoring others, killing them. Many people are destroyed mentally from the first sign of non-appreciation. When we talk about some jobs depending on appreciation, the perfect example is writers. There are many other examples like musicians, actors and many others. They must be appreciated. This destruction usually leads to mental non-curable disturbance. The examples previously mentioned are the most obvious examples of negative appreciation. Once it happens, they are destroyed instantly.

Now let’s think about other minor examples, minor in appearance, but not in importance. The non-appreciated mother, father. These people give and give for no return, some internal stability keeping them from being destroyed. Keeping them giving and giving even if it is only from their point of view. Talking about dumped lovers for no reason. The list can go on for a while.

Imagine if one word of appreciation, let it be thanks, have been told to them every now and then. Imagine how many people would be happy for only this free word. Imagine if you gave up your ego a little bit and give a word of appreciation. For the humankind happiness, see what a noble idea you are working for? Imagine the happiness you will feel after an act like this?

I say thank to every person who made me the character I’m now. I say thanks to every community I joined for developing myself to the better. I thank my mother and father for supporting me even if it was by means of opposing me from their point of view. Thanks for my friends and for my so-called friends for you taught me how life can be. And finally, thanks Bassem Sabry for the Paradigm Shift idea evolution.

Life is not always fair, in fact its not fair at all…
don't we all think this way? What is fair or who is fair anyway? Seems like this word doesn't even exist. If life isn't fair so are we, because we are part of this life too, so who started the "unfair" issue first?, is it Life or Us..!!

You are the master of your actions as an adult, you choose to say words you want, how you dress and what to dress, u choose what to say , how you say it and who to talk to, you have the door wide open for you to go anywhere you want with people you want. U become way too independent THOUGH , we are not the free compared to other cultures, but still compared with the last generation we are more free to do what we want.
so what you do now you are responsible for it, no-one can hurt you or do something bad to you unless u gave them the opportunity to do it. Right?!!.. UMMM not really.

Back to the "Fair" issue, and how its related about what I ve been saying concerning independence and such. I realized it when i was reading my expensive new interstice book that i just bought a day ago, conceder that i pay allot of attention to keep my things really protected especially that i have two little monkish at home.. OPUS did i say monkish? Oh sorry i mean my two little brothers. i believe that everything they do is only because i was not careful enough and gave them the chance to mess with my stuff, i was going to scream at them but before i do i had a snapshot of what i used to do when i was little.
so many books i ve written in them (actually i couldn't write still back then) it was so fun to fo so.. mmm i can still remember that how i used to take any book i saw with innocent look and creative streak i used to draw lines here and lines there, tho i was young but i was aware that what i did was wrong.
i realized that yeah what goes around comes around, and maybe we may think that this Life isnt fair, we may be wrong.. it is fair, i guess who is not fair, is just US. a while ago i was going to scream at my brothers becasue they did what i used to do when i was child.. how ironic, ha.

I do remember some of my shamful stuff when i did when i was young as a matter of high curiousty, it happens NOW by the little angelic-devilish hands of my little brothers. letrally all the things that i did , they come and hit me personally.. and how am i to complain, it seems fair to me.
i just came to this point when i saw that we may be independant enough and old enough to be responsible to all that happens to us, BUT, no matter how old or consiouse and carefull we are.. fair is going to take its toll, weather we like it or not.

Well it came to me when read IRC's post about experience relation with time, i thought why we just relate things with time that much.
we don't call a friend a close one without the tag of " i know him for so long ", we get scare when see a young doctor just trying to examine us and so on

Sometimes i do that too but in friendship issues i used to ignore that time factor, maybe in love too, here it's not about time it's just about harmony

Once i had a friend for just 4 days well they have been really continuous 4 days but still 4 days !!! i was down and i rarely be so,, but when i feel so, i don't allow people to see me but my closest, i've just allowed her , i was wondering myself why i did so she's just a new friend if we took it from that angle .. but now after 6 years together i knew i was blessed when forgot about that time thing – in a hundred other issue- i just search for the harmony between me and others .

It worked in many things when i've a hunch, i just follow it.. not a naive one i mean when feel the harmony i just take off my watch

My posts will be posted in Paradigm Shift Online Commuity

I traveled a lot, I roamed a lot, saw a lot, thought a lot, suffered a lot. Traveling sometimes brings joy, happiness, suffer, pain, astonishment. All kinds of people are available. I always believe that people are the same. But, not the one kind same, they are different kinds. You know, like mass production principle. You have a definite number of products will be produced in a huge number. You will see millions of products, but are they different? You can easily realize.

Many people sell the world. A few just buy it, which always come to a surprise. Because, if you buy the world, you will think of yourself as someone alive. Someone you thought have died, died a long time ago. While you travel, you are put in this exam a million times, and you wish you would have died alone. With no more suffering for people who surround you, either because they don’t deserve it, or they are too evil to even think to take revenge from them. It is available sometimes to fix, sometimes available to fight, but you don’t have the courage, and you don’t have all the time in the world. You wait and wait till the game is over and there is no chance. You keep blaming yourself for being in the wrong time, in the wrong place, doing the wrong action.

You travel, you see a face you know, or you are supposed to know. This face tells you he is a friend of yours. You are surprised. Seems like you are losing control f your memory. Again and again trying to remember, then you leave him alone. You run and run trying to escape. You stop and laugh, shaking you head and head away for home. When you remember this again, you realize you didn’t even consider the possibility if the man was wrong or not. You escape yourself why did you escape, why did you run. No answer.

You travel, you meet new people. You are betrayed million times, you are rescued once. You have this friend for sometime, thank him for sometimes. Then you lose contact. Then it comes to your mind from time to time, how this pure kindness rescued you for no price, for no reward. Not even for the thanking reward. You are astonished how you leave this person like this. How do you let yourself die alone like this with losing a friend you could die before finding someone like him. Who knows, definitely not me.

It seems like I’m the one who sold the world, without even losing control. It was intentionally, it was never under any kind of oppression, internal or external. And I’m sorry for it.